TheChez.net

by ssjrem

All right, a blog that doesn’t have to do with either Dragonball Z or the box office. I came up with this idea  a couple weeks ago and I figured it might make an interesting blog. So, then, here we go. I was originally going to just limit this to movie characters, but there were a few others that I just had to throw in. And I know that there are a lot of annoying characters not in this list but that’s because I’m either not aware of them or because they just plain slipped my mind. Let’s begin the countdown.

12. Evan Treborn (The Buttefly Effect)

Sometimes, the first time I watch a movie, I don’t like it all that much. It has to grow on me. Then other times, I like a movie the first time and upon repeat viewings, it only gets worse every time. The Butterfly Effect is an example of the latter. It’s really not that great of a movie. It’s a very interesting idea and all, but just not executed that well. The thing that kills me, though, is how annoying Ashton Kutcher’s character, Evan Treborn, is. The name is supposed to be a pun on “event reborn,” which goes along with the whole time travel idea and is mildly clever. Evan keeps going back in time and he tries to fix everything over and over again but he’s just a complete fucking idiot and he just keeps making things worse for himself every time. He makes such stupid decisions about how to fix his past and it just annoys the hell out of me.

11. Pikachu (Pokemon)

I’m sure even a lot of diehard Pokemon fans would admit that Pikachu is fucking annoying. I never got into Pokemon as a kid and I don’t really regret that at all. I do think I’m too harsh on Pokemon sometimes because I think mostly of that god awful anime series. I never actually played any of the games and those might actually be fun. Regardless, though, Pikachu is fucking annoying. He just keeps saying his own name over and over again and acts all cute and shit. I can’t stand that. And then he has that stupid fucking annoying lightning attack in Super Smash Bros. that drives me crazy. I hate when characters in Super Smash Bros. have moves like that, ones where fucking noobs can just pick up the character and start whooping ass with it. I’m no Smash Bros. pro and I don’t profess to be, but I just hate when someone who’s never fucking played the game before picks Pikachu and next thing you that fucking lightning move just sends me right off the playing field. Now, on other hand, Raichu, he was badass. But I just can’t stand Pikachu.

10. Kaepora Gaebora (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)

I fucking hated this god damn owl. He shows up all the time at various points in Hyrule and fucking annoys the hell out of you with information you don’t give a fuck about. In Zelda games, lots of time after you’re told a story or something, you’ll get an option of whether on not you want to hear it again. Well, for some reason, when it comes to Kaepora and only Kaepora, “yes” is the default selection, so as you’re rapidly pressing the A button to get through the damn conversation, you’ll accidentally hit yes and then have to go through the whole thing again. Thankfully, he doesn’t show up once you’ve become an adult, but he’s annoying as all hell when you’re a kid, especially on repeated play-throughs

9. Misa Amane (Death Note)

It seems like pretty much everything, no matter how fucking good it is has to have at least one annoying character. In the anime master piece that is Death Note, Misa is that requisite character. She doesn’t come into the series until about fifteen or so episode in. And she does actually add quite a twist to the show when she does first make her presence known. It’s all a big mystery as to who she actually is because we don’t physically see her for a while. However, then we find out she’s this annoying dumb blonde. She’s absolutely infatuated with the show’s main character, Light Yagami, and follows him around like a love sick puppy. It gets really annoying. Misa’s character basically becomes useless after about fifteen episodes or so and it doesn’t seem like there’s any point in keeping her around. She does have a few good moments and her screentime does decrease a bit as time goes on. I actually found her less annoying in the English dub than the original Japanese version because her seiyū (Japanese word for voice actor) is way more annoying than her English voice actress. Then again, Light’s voice actor doesn’t really do a good job at all in the English dub, so either way you can’t really win. Misa’s annoying no matter what, though.

8. Tingle (The Legend of Zelda Series)

I fucking hate Tingle. The one good thing about Tingle, though, is that he’s mostly avoidable. He made his first appearance in Majora’s Mask back in 2000 and then later returned in 2003 with The Wind Waker. If you want to, he can completely avoid him all together in Majora’s Mask. He does provide you with useful maps of the land of Termina, but they’re not essential to completing the game. However, he came full circle in Wind Waker. You cannot avoid him in this game. You first have to rescue him from prison and then he talks to you for about forty-five minutes. Then, at the end of the game, you need to get all these charts deciphered to find the shards of the Triforce. You have no choice but to go to Tingle. And then he charges an absolutely ridiculous amount of rupees for deciphering these. Okay, Tingle, I didn’t free you from jail or anything. It’s not like I need these charts deciphered to save the entire fucking world. It’s not like you have a hard life, fucking standing there while you make your brothers work hard all day. No, you need like 8 million rupees a pop for all seven of the fucking charts. The only good thing is that he’s only in those two games and you can even avoid him entirely in Majoras’ Mask. I just wish it were the same in Wind Waker.

7. Dolores Umbridge (Harry Potter)

Dolores Umbridge is one of the most easily-hated characters I have ever come across. Every single time she was on screen in Harry Potter, I wanted to murder her. I wanted her to become real just so that I could murder her. I hate her that much. I cannot fucking stand the woman. She insists on being so perfect and she carries about her such an air of unjust self-imposed superiority. And she’s just a bitch too. She refuses to accept the fact that Voldemort has returned and makes Harry write “I will not tell lies” over and over again….. with his own blood! She eventually gets fucked up by Grawp and the centaurs at the end, but I kind of wish that they just killed her. She didn’t annoy me nearly as much in the book, but maybe that’s because I couldn’t actually see or hear her. I still hated her to death in the book, but it wasn’t as bad.

6. Ashley Graham (Resident Evil 4)

One of the great things about Ashley that I can’t say for anyone else on this list is that if you want to kill her, you actually can! I think Resident Evil 4 is one of the greatest games that I have ever played. I’m not really not that good of a gamer and this game was really fucking difficult for me to beat, but I eventually did. One of the things that makes it so damn difficult is fucking Ashley. You go through a good part of the game as the badass Leon Scott Kennedy, who has all these guns and skills and he likes to fuck up zombies (yes, I know that they’re technically not zombies, they’re “ganados,” but for all intents and purposes, let’s just call them zombies). Then you rescue Ashley and you have to protect her as you move through the game. And it’s fucking annoying as all hell. Her voice is so annoying as she constantly whines for Leon to help her. And she’ll just fucking stand there sometimes when there are zombies everywhere. Or she’ll just crouch on the ground like a little bitch while I’m thinking to myself, let’s fucking run away from the god damn zombies. I have no fucking ammo left, Ashley. We need to fucking move, you bitch. You can kill Ashley using the various weapons in the game, but it’s not exactly satisfying. She just kind of falls over no matter what you use. I wish her head actually exploded if you got a headshot with the rifle like it does when you shoot the zombies. Fuck, man, that’s just sadistic. And a bit graphic. I apologize. Let’s move on.

5. Babidi (Dragonball Z)

Babidi is another character that is so easy to hate. His annoying voice and his attitude toward everyone else in the show just annoys me. Babidi thinks he’s the shit, but he’s a weak little piece of shit that almost anyone in the series could defeat. Hell, I’d reckon even Videl could probably beat him in hand to hand combat. Babidi has a bunch of magical skills that he uses to his advantage, though. He even manages to put the king of all demons, Dabura, under his control. But he can’t tame Vegeta as hard as he tries because Vegeta is too much of a badass. Babidi thinks he can control someone as ludicrously powerful as Majin Buu and thinks he’s fucking awesome because he has Buu “under his control.” I was so pumped when Piccolo stepped in and chopped Babidi in half. It was practically the only thing Piccolo did for the whole damn saga. Lo and behold, Babidi’s actually alive and then Buu heals him. Thankfully, Buu gets fed up with his shit and with one punch, sends Babidi to oblivion. I always feel somewhat sick for feeling satisfied when a character dies, but oh well. I fucking hated Babidi.

4. Jar Jar Binks (Star Wars: The Phantom Menace)

Come on, it’s Jar Jar Binks. What more do I need to say?

3. Roseanne

I never actually watched Roseanne. Why? Because I fucking hated Roseanne. Why? Her fucking voice. Enough said.

2. Navi (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)

I know I’ve included three Zelda characters on this list, but don’t get me wrong. I fucking love Zelda. I think that it’s the shit. It’s my favorite video game series of all time, with Metroid a very close second. But, man, they kind of have a knack for inviting annoying characters. Zelda games seem to have a lot of sidekicks and whatnot. Majora’s Mask had Tatl, who was like Navi only far less annoying. Wind Waker had the King of Red Lions, who wasn’t really annoying at all. And Twilight Princess had Midna, who was really more a partner than a sidekick and I actually really, really liked her character. But Navi is just fucking annoying. She will not leave you alone. She will just keep saying “Hey!” or “Listen!” over and over and over again in a high pitched voice until you eventually give in and just see what useless fucking information she has for you. What’s that Navi, Sheik said something about a Fire Temple in a volcano? Yes, Navi, I know. Why the fuck else would I be in a fucking volcano on my way to the temple as you’re telling me I should go in a volcano? I’m already there! Navi isn’t that bad on a first play through and she does give you somewhat useful information about enemies, but any further playthroughs and you will ignore her as much as possible. But, then again, Navi was basically the impetus for  Majora’s Mask and I’m glad for that because Majora’s Mask is my personal favorite Zelda game. Anyway, it’s now time. Number one, here we go!

1. Skids and Mudflap (Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen)

In every form of media that I have ever come across, for every character that I have ever encountered, I have never found two so annoying as these two. I fucking hated them more than I can possibly express. Both Transformers films had annoying characters. But these two just took it to a whole other level, which I had never dared to even imagine. Every time they fucking spoke, I literally wanted to block my fucking ears. I couldn’t stand. They were such obvious stereotypes and they would not shut the hell up. Why the fuck were they the two that went along with Sam and Mikaela and every one for the majority of the film. Why not fucking someone cooler or more interesting? Why not Arcee or something and then they could actually explain how autobots have different genders, something they kind of just completely skipped. Now, we had to have these two annoying as all hell fucking piece of shit walking stereotype annoying fucking assholes. Nothing they said was funny. Nothing they said or did made me want to like them. Toward the end of the movie when Devastator forms and starts fucking shit up, he sucks in one of these guys into his mouth. And I’m sitting there in the  movie theatre thinking, “Yes! Yes! Thank you Michael Bay, thank you! Yes, he’s killing them off! There is a god!” Next thing you know, they somehow miraculously survive and start actually damaging Devastator. I’d never been so pissed off that a good guy survived in my entire life. That should not happen. A movie should never, ever make you hate a character so much that you are actually rejoicing when said character dies. I was rooting for the villain for Christ’s sake! And it’s not even like Devastator was particularly awesomely badass or anything. Sure, he was pretty cool and all, but he had hardly any screen time and we really didn’t so much of him. Even still, I was like, “Fuck yeah, Devastator! Fuck their shit up! Hell yes!” I hate these two. I hate them so fucking much. I will still get Transformers on DVD when it comes out. But I will do that for the action scenes and the awesomeness that is Optimus Prime. I will literally fast forward through every part with these two in it. I wish so ardently that Devastator had eaten these two and then shit them back out in a million fucking pieces. Whatever, man. I guess that’s it. Twelve (well, technically thirteen) characters that I have found extremely annoying. Just know, though, that Skids and Mudflap stand in a league completely their own.