TheChez.net

By: Dukemich

This is the first time I’m doing this so why not start with Beatrix Kiddo from Kill Bill and Kobe Bryant from the Los Angeles Lakers. How did I think of this match-up? Both are nicknamed “The Black Mamba.” Kiddo was I believe nicknamed the Black Mamba first. I don’t know the origins of either nickname. All right let’s talk about the fighters.

Kobe Bryant: Kobe is one of the greatest basketball players to ever play the game. Although originally drafted by the Charlotte Hornets, Kobe has played for the Lakers his entire career. He’s won four NBA championships and one MVP. In my opinion right now he’s still the best player in the NBA. He can do it all whether it’s scoring, defending, dribbling, or passing. He’s also really fast.

Over the years players have had one good defensive game against Kobe Bryant. They usually claim they are “Kobe Stoppers.” However, he always proves them wrong the next time they guard him because he’s truly unstoppable.

Beatrix Kiddo: Kiddo is the deadliest assassin in the world. She killed the “Crazy 88″ as well as the five Viper assassins who tried to kill her. She has the best training in the world from the great Pai Mei. She’s pretty much unstoppable as well, especially with a Hanzo sword.

The Fight: The fight takes place at the Lakers’ home court(The Staples Center). Kobe’s finishing up his workout with some free throws while Beatrix Kiddo walks in the from the stands. She has blood on her jumpsuit that is not her own(security was tight). Both clearly know the fight is on considering Kiddo is carrying a sword and has blood on her. Kobe is using “The Gun” to rebound for him and shoot the balls at him. Kiddo walks on the court while Kobe’s still shooting free throws. Then Kobe runs behind ”The Gun” and starts shooting basketballs at Kiddo. Kiddo with her Hanzo sword simply cuts each ball in half as Kobe shoots them at her. When ”The Gun” runs out of balls, Kobe pushes ”The Gun” at Kiddo. Then he jumps up grabs the rim and takes down the basketball hoop right where Kiddo is standing. Kiddo moves out of the way in time. Without any weapons left, Kobe is forced to fight with his fists. He tries to punch Kiddo but Kiddo cuts his hand off and stabs him in the heart. Then I weep for months.

Winner:  Beatrix Kiddo

Kobe is still the real Black Mamba to me but I am a Laker fan.

Hope you enjoyed. See ya.